University.

"It’s the best time of your life" and "You’ll make friends there that you will keep for life" is what I was told countless times before packing up and moving to uni, I mean I heard these years before even applying to university. But this just seems to be the case for everyone apart from me. I’m in a small flat with four other people and not one of them are like me, they like to get drunk and party where as I like to have a casual chat and stay in. I’ve tried to live their life but it just confirmed that it wasn’t for me, but my problem is that everyone else have bonded with their flatmates. Making it difficult to make new friends. I’m trying so hard to make things work but most nights I am sat on my own unless my boyfriend or family come over. I have accepted that and am fine with it but I just feel like I’ve been lied to about the university experience. 

I just finished my last shift at work and as I put away my pager and clocked out it finally hit me that I’m moving and I won’t be going to work every week. And then I felt my eyes filling and I had to leave quickly to make sure no one saw me cry. And then I saw my dog which made me cry more because I’m going to miss him like crazy…

I don’t want to go to university.

In my film class I was trying Cherry Aid for the first time and my teacher asked “what should we call the documentary about Emily trying Cherry Aid for the first time” and one kid just started into fits of laughter and then the slowly room understood..

Too tired. Last night went on for too long.